Alright, let’s gab about this fella, Max Scherzer, and his fancy house. Don’t rightly know him from Adam, but they say he throws balls for a livin’, some kinda “Texas Ranger” they call him. Sounds like a lawman to me, but my grandson tells me it’s baseball. Go figure.
Anyways, this Max fella, he’s got himself a real humdinger of a house down in Jupiter, Florida. Jupiter, that’s where the rich folks go, I reckon. They say it’s worth a whole heap of money, like fifteen point four million dollars! Can you imagine? That’s more money than I’ve seen in my whole life, and then some.
Now, this ain’t no ordinary shack, mind you. This house is big, real big. They tell me it’s got seven thousand seven hundred and seventy-eight square feet. That’s a lot of room for one fella, even if he’s got a whole baseball team livin’ with him. I reckon he could get lost in there and not be found for a week!
- Five bedrooms, they say. Why a man needs that many bedrooms is beyond me. Maybe he likes to sleep in a different bed every night, like some kinda king.
- And get this, he’s got eight and a half bathrooms! Eight and a half! What’s he doin’ in all them bathrooms, I wonder? Must be a mighty clean fella, or maybe he just likes to look at himself in the mirror a lot.
They got pictures of this place, you know, online. My grandson showed me on that little shiny box he’s always lookin’ at. It’s got a fancy pool, big enough to swim laps in, not like them little plastic ones we used to have for the kids. And the whole thing looks brand new, like nobody’s ever lived in it before. Custom-built, they say. That means they made it special, just for him. Guess when you got that much money, you can have anything you want.
This house, it’s right on the water, too. A waterfront mansion, they call it. That sounds mighty nice, sittin’ on the porch, watchin’ the boats go by. I bet he’s got a fancy boat, too. Probably one of them big ones with a kitchen and a bedroom on it. Maybe he even goes fishin’ right from his backyard. Wouldn’t that be somethin’?
Luxury, that’s the word they use for this kinda place. Luxury this and luxury that. I reckon it just means fancy and expensive. Everything in that house is probably the best money can buy. Soft beds, fancy TVs, maybe even one of them toilets that washes your backside for you. I ain’t never seen nothin’ like that in my life.
Now, I ain’t one for envyin’ folks, but I gotta say, that Max Scherzer, he’s livin’ the high life. He’s worked hard for it, I guess, throwin’ them baseballs and all. And if he wants to spend his money on a big fancy house, well, that’s his business. But I still can’t help but think about all the good that money could do for folks who ain’t got nothin’. Feedin’ the hungry, clothin’ the poor, that’s what I’d do with it. But then again, nobody ever asked me.
So, that’s the story of Max Scherzer’s house, as best as I can tell it. A big, fancy, expensive place down in Florida. A place most folks like me can only dream about. But hey, dreamin’ don’t cost nothin’, right? And who knows, maybe one day I’ll win the lottery and get myself a little shack by the creek. It might not be a fifteen-million-dollar mansion, but it’ll be home, and that’s all that really matters.
Anyways, that’s enough gabbin’ for one day. I gotta go make some supper. Biscuits and gravy tonight, if the Lord’s willin’ and the creek don’t rise. You take care now, and don’t go spendin’ all your money on fancy houses, ya hear?
This Max Scherzer’s home sure is something special, and it’s interesting to see how those well-off folks live. Makes you think about what’s important in life, that’s for sure. A roof over your head and food on the table, that’s all a person really needs, I reckon. But a pool wouldn’t hurt neither, especially in this Florida heat.
Speaking of heat, I bet that waterfront location is mighty nice in the summer. A cool breeze coming off the water, sitting on the porch with a glass of sweet tea…that sounds like heaven to me. Not that I’ve ever experienced anything like that, but a gal can dream, can’t she?
I heard tell that Jupiter, Florida is a real fancy place, full of big houses and rich folks. I wonder if they got a good Piggly Wiggly down there, or if they shop at some fancy-pants grocery store. I bet they got all kinds of fruits and vegetables that I ain’t never even heard of. And probably a whole aisle full of different kinds of water. Water! Can you imagine? Paying good money for water when it comes right out of the tap for free.
This whole thing about Max Scherzer’s mansion just goes to show you that there’s all kinds of people in this world, living all kinds of different lives. Some folks got more money than they know what to do with, and some folks are just scraping by. But in the end, we all gotta answer to the same man upstairs, and I reckon he don’t care much about how big your house is or how much money you got in the bank.
So, there you have it. A little bit about Max Scherzer’s house and a whole lot about what I think about it. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go check on my chickens. They’re probably squawking up a storm, wanting their supper. At least they don’t need a fancy mansion to be happy, just a little bit of corn and a safe place to roost.
